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Monday Mailbag: My Man Wants a Baby

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Dear Darling Nikki,
My man keeps pressuring me to have a baby and I really don’t think I want one.
Is it OK to NOT have the MOM GENE or am I just acting like a big baby?

Signed,
Not Ready



Dear Not Ready,
It’s OK to not want to be a mother right now, later or never. Nobody should be FORCED into motherhood! 

Motherhood can be a beautiful thing but it’s not for everybody and as my man, Mr. Ten says, “a baby is not a puppy.”  Meaning, you just can’t take it back to the pound if you grow tired of it. 

I applaud you for standing up to your man and not being talked into something you don’t want to do or are not ready to do.

Just because you aren’t ready now doesn’t mean you won’t ever be ready.  People change their minds all the time and if you are firm on your decision that’s fine too.  I suggest you sit down with your man and have a talk with him.  Sometimes when one person wants children out of the relationship and the other does not it can be a deal breaker.  If that is the outcome, it’s better to know that now then ten years down the road.  #TRUETALK

And for the record, having MOM GENES is different for everybody.  Some people don’t ever get MOM GENES (but have baby after baby that somebody else or the state raises), sometimes, the MOM GENE kicks in when the person finds out they are expecting, others have the MOM GENE all along and never have children so don’t get caught up in that hormone hype!!!!!!

At the end of the day, you have to live life for YOU and what makes YOU HAPPY, not your man!  Deep down inside YOU ultimately know what you want

First steps, sit down and talk to him and find out what he really wants and if you can really give it to him.  If not, it may be a good time to consider a break or finding someone more in line with your goals and life aspirations at this time. 

Hugs,
Darling Nikki

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Darling Nikki

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